They all say, "Ewwww, you eat spam". They say that until they eat the fried rice. The fried rice always turns them. Spam Fried Rice: True paddle fuel. Let's do this.
First, you've got to make the rice the night before. Take it from the rice cooker and put it in a zip lock plastic bag. The zip lock bag lets you break it all apart with your fingers so it's not one big rice ball. Like that trick? That one's all me.
Next day you've got a little prep to do because once things get rollin' it's tough to stop and dice something... especially when you're free hand is holding a beer. Cut up the following things just the way I tell you- this is art after all.
Carrots: skin 'em and cut them into match sticks. I don't know maybe two or three carrots worth of orange matchsticks.
Green onions: these guys are my favorite things to slice- they are cut up so cleanly it's just super satisfying to see the perfect little green slices come off the blade. Do a whole rubber banded bunch of these.
Spam: I use the small can, a little goes a long way. You MUST dice the Spam creature into small cubes- this is the secret to good spam fried rice. Take your time, this stuff cuts really nicely.
Got all your little piles lined up and ready to go? While you're getting things together, set out your little bottle of sesame seed oil- a couple of drops of this stuff really makes this thing happen. Also, three or four eggs and a bag of frozen peas- the small "petite" peas and you're only going to use about a third of the bag.
Alright, let's get this thing going. Get a big pan nice and hot with some vegetable oil- add the carrots and spam. Let the carrots get a little brown around the edges and look for a nice little crust on the spam. Keep that pan moving' boy!
Add your green onions and let everything get nice and toasty for another three minutes or so. Now slowly add your rice, a handful (yes, use your hand- you washed it right?) at a time to the pan. Add, stir. Add, stir.
Once you've got all the rice nicely mixed up and frying right along with its brother carrot and sister spam, make a hole in the rice in the middle of the pan. Push it aside until you've exposed the pan. Crack three or four eggs right into that hole and let the eggs start to cook. Use your spatula to scramble them and slowly fold (fancy word for "mix")them into the rice mixture. Fold, and stir. Fold, and stir.
Now turn the heat off. Mix in a third of the bag of frozen peas (the hot rice will thaw them don't worry) and add two or three drops of sesame seed oil to the whole thing. Taste your fried rice. Like it? Maybe it could use a little soy sauce? Go ahead add a little. Maybe a couple more drops of sesame seed oil? No problem.
Invite some friends over and kill that stuff- they'll like it, they always do.